


Peach and Zelda - Two Retarded Mongrels

by PastaBucket



Category: Super Mario & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms
Genre: Ahegao, Alternative Universe - Mongrels, F/M, Rape as Comedy, Reverse Rape, Shameless Smut, retardation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:09:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24355600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PastaBucket/pseuds/PastaBucket
Summary: Mongrel Peach and mongrel Zelda rapes Link. (Well, mostly mongrel Zelda.)Rape is funny. Laugh, damnit!
Relationships: Link/Princess Peach, Link/Zelda (Legend of Zelda)
Kudos: 3





	Peach and Zelda - Two Retarded Mongrels

"We must fuck!", Zelda groaned, her pussy dripping with fresh cum juice.  
Peach, on the other end of the phone, after it got through her thick monkey skull, grunted in agreement. "We must!"  
"How do we fuck?", Zelda moaned.  
"I think we both put penises into vaginas.", Peach figured.  
"Nooo! Where do we GET penises to put inside our vaginas?!", Zelda explained.  
"I don't know!", Peach exclaimed.  
"But we must FUCK!", a frustrated Zelda reminded her.  
"I must fuck too!", Peach yearned, her pussy juices beginning to drip in heat.  
"Fuuuuck!", Zelda groaned.  
"Fuuuuuuck!", Peached joined in.  
"Come over!", Zelda growled.  
"But I don't have a penis!", Peached gasped.  
"But we must fuck! We must fuck TOGETHER!", Zelda explained.  
"Fuck together?"  
"Fuck Together!", Zelda explained.  
Peach just groaned out her excitement, and Zelda answered her with her own groan before hanging up.  
As Peach approached Zelda's apartment door, her pink gown had left a little snail trail of lubrication behind her. She tried to figure out how to use the doorbell, but in the end just settled for roaring out her aching want, loud enough for Zelda to hear her: "FUUUUUUCK!!!"  
Zelda opened the door, her purple spandex torn up at the crotch, exposing her throbbing, dripping cunt. "Fuuuuuck!"  
She gestured for Peach to get inside, guiding her to a map of Hyrule, that looked just like any other residential area.  
"Fuck!", Zelda pointed at the map. She had marked down a lot of circles, crosses and penises on there, in red crayon, indicating where all the penises lived. As Peach just gawked at her genius, Zelda pointed to each of them in turn: "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!" Lastly she pointed at Link's house, groaning out "FUUUUUUUCK!" as she drooled.  
"Fuuuuuck!", Peach drooled in unison with her. She wanted to taste Link's dick with her pussy so bad.

Link was strolling down the street, when all of a sudden, two savage beasts barred his way. They looked like escaped zoo animals, except they were wearing female clothes.  
"Oh fuck me!", he exclaimed to himself. The two retards looked especially savage today, and they were staring intently at him while drooling.  
"Nope!" Link turned around, trying to quickly head to his apartment, but he was quickly jumped and sent to the ground. "Oof!"  
Zelda straddled his firm butt with her wet cunt as Peach struggled to get one of his boots off.  
"Hey, get off me!", he screamed.  
"Give me your penis!", Zelda groaned. "I want it inside of me!"  
"No, what the fuck?!" Link tried to crawl away, but Zelda already pinning him to the ground, made that impossible. "Heeelp!" He felt one of his boots leave his feet, followed by Peaches hands on his sole. "Hey! Stop that!"  
"Fuuuuck...", Peached moaned as she adoringly caressed his foot.  
"Hey that tickles! Stoop!", Link complained.  
A moment later Peach began twisting his foot.  
"Oww! Stop!" She was forcing him to turn around on his back. Finally Zelda eased her weight from his butt, allowing him to. A moment later she pressed down again, squeezing his dick with her slimy pussy lips. "No! Stop!"  
Zelda just chuckled sadisticly at him through a victorious grin. "Penis will go in vagina now. We make babies.", she breathed with excitement.  
"Babies?! No-no-no! Absolutely no babies!", Link screamed as he felt princess Peach mercilessly pulling down his pants. The feeling of the morgel's bare skin against his, almost made him puke.  
"Fuck.", Zelda grunted as she leaned forward and directed his cock to her retard pussy, before shooting it all the way inside her disgusting flesh.  
"Aaaugh!", Link screamed in terror as Peach giggled at him.  
"Fuck! Fuuck! Fuuck!", Zelda gasped as she begin to work him with her hip.  
"No, please!", Linked begged as he felt his cock involuntarily stiffen inside her. "Just get off me, you stupid mongrel!"  
Zelda didn't even hear his protests. Link's dick was all that she felt now, as it cleaved her open, filling her, and for every thrust pushing every button in her just right. She was barely aware of Peach's hands wrapping around her breasts and pinching her nipples as she continued to ride with primal grunts.  
Link tried to push the retard off him, even more so when he began to feel that what she was doing, was somehow going to make him cum. "No! Please! Get off! Get off!"  
...but when Link finally erupted, Zelda just sank down and gave out a long, mindless groan as she felt all Links semen spurt into her womb, followed by her own twitching pussy responding, milking it to the very last drop. Only then did some actual thoughts begin to enter her head. She'd done it. She was finally going to have a baby.  
Princess Peach pulled at her arm. "Get off! ME fuck now. I want fuck too."

**Author's Note:**

> I don't understand how gangrapists think, because they'd somehow have to agree to do something horrible yet intimate, but together. ...and this is despite having hung around a couple of gang rapists - I didn't really ask them what went on in their heads. The most I got out of one of them was that women should feel thankful over having recieved his dick.  
> ...so this is basically a compromize. My first idea was to do a more serious and sympathetic take on gangrapists, with actual intelligent gangrapist protagonists, sort of like 100 Ways To Kill You, but one of my exes was gangraped twice, so that's just going to steer up a bunch of depressing memories in me, and the whole thing is just too fucked up for me to seriously fathom.


End file.
